dear readers,
you have been with me through so much. I have opened up to you about my healing, my despair, my hopes, my dreams, and lots more in between (in this catagory of posts). I hope very much I give a balanced view of my life.
Though I choose to focus on what's right and what I enjoy, I think you can appreciate that being so ill over such a long time takes away a lot of who you are able to outwardly be. So in that respect I do not get to live as the person I really am, though I try hard to make up for that in other ways. Being my true self in those areas i can manage, such as writing and taking photos here.
And that's why getting to know myself inside, in my soul, has been such an important part of keeping myself strong enough to continue handling the illness & what's missing from my life.
I could not as i grew into adulthood, get to know myself through what I was doing out in the world, or in a University, as the illness prevented that, especially over the 10 years at my worst. But I could come to understand things about myself in other ways, my insights, my likes and dislikes, my priorities and what matters most when all else is stripped away.
I would not have found my passion for writing, had it not been through listening to my heart in times of great suffering. I wouldn't have made the friendships I have, with people who also have the same condition and who's bravery inspires me. Nor would i have "met" the friends i have made in more recent times who live around the world, if I had not opened up on my blog.
I hope when you visit me here you see the real me, or as much of her as i am able to be, given the physical limitations. I am a whole host of seeming contradictions, I think that is so of us all, in different ways.
I notice how I can be delicate yet also strong, just one aspect of the "two sides to every story" that we all have.
One thing that serious illness does, is tear down the ability to put up a front. Its impossible to try to be something youre not when you havent even the energy to be who you are.
I always want this blog to just be a simple and peaceful place to come & restore your spirit. That is my goal for myself and for anyone visiting.
More thoughts on blogging openly and honestly soon in part 2, meanwhile you may also like these posts by the lovely Ez at Creature Comforts and by the lovely Lisa at Soulomama, as they were what prompted me to write today, they share their reflections on blogging authentically, share what they are afraid of letting people know, and the pit falls of comparing ourselves to one another in the blog world...
here's to sharing and expressing...authentically & powerfully
love Kat x
ps. the top photo is a beautiful origami butterfly made for me by Jules, and the writing is my own, i placed it on the photo using a new app called signote, its fab!













































