Secrets of a Butterfly

Blogging with honesty part 1

 

 

dear readers,

you have been with me through so much. I have opened up to you about my healing, my despair, my hopes, my dreams, and lots more in between (in this catagory of posts). I hope very much I give a balanced view of my life.

Though I choose to focus on what's right and what I enjoy, I think you can appreciate that being so ill over such a long time takes away a lot of who you are able to outwardly be. So in that respect I do not get to live as the person I really am, though I try hard to make up for that in other ways. Being my true self in those areas i can manage, such as writing and taking photos here.

 And that's why getting to know myself inside, in my soul, has been such an important part of keeping myself strong enough to continue handling the illness & what's missing from my life. 
I could not as i grew into adulthood, get to know myself through what I was doing out in the world, or in a University, as the illness prevented that, especially over the 10 years at my worst. But I could come to understand things about myself in other ways, my insights, my likes and dislikes, my priorities and what matters most when all else is stripped away.
I would not have found my passion for writing, had it not been through listening to my heart in times of great suffering. I wouldn't have made the friendships I have, with people who also have the same condition and who's bravery inspires me. Nor would i have "met" the friends i have made in more recent times who live around the world, if I had not opened up on my blog.
 
I hope when you visit me here you see the real me, or as much of her as i am able to be, given the physical limitations. I am a whole host of seeming contradictions, I think that is so of us all, in different ways.
I notice how I can be delicate yet also strong, just one aspect of the "two sides to every story" that we all have.
 
One thing that serious illness does, is tear down the ability to put up a front. Its impossible to try to be something youre not when you havent even the energy to be who you are.
I always want this blog to just be a simple and peaceful place to come & restore your spirit. That is my goal for myself and for anyone visiting.

More thoughts on blogging openly and honestly soon in part 2, meanwhile you may also like these posts by the lovely Ez at Creature Comforts and by the lovely Lisa at Soulomama, as they were what prompted me to write today, they share their reflections on blogging authentically, share what they are afraid of letting people know, and the pit falls of comparing ourselves to one another in the blog world...

here's to sharing and expressing...authentically & powerfully

love Kat x

ps. the top photo is a beautiful origami butterfly made for me by Jules, and the writing is my own, i placed it on the photo using a new app called signote, its fab!

 

 

Reflecting on how things are

Hi lovelies
 
I have been finding it a little hard to blog lately, you may notice if you visit often, that i tend to start a topic or catagory and then lose momentum. I also find it difficult to share anything personal when not much happens. But i wanted to bring you up to date with where i am at.
Things in my little world have been up & down and where some days I have not been up to anything physically, other days I have, and so my focus is on such things as getting up and wearing clothes and maybe seeing some of the flowers in the garden or getting some fabrics out and crafting a little.

I find using instagram so easy for sharing creatively, and then I'm chatting with people on there. This means I have had less attention or time on my blog, and that feels a little sad. I find getting the photos edited and the writing done is harder for my blog. because I have to be on the netbook, as opposed to resting with my phone in hand as I do for instagram.
 
But.... I have signed up to Holly's Blogging your way part 2 online class. Hopeful that I'll have a good month and be able to partake fully in the forums and topics covered. In the 5 years I have kept Secrets, I have picked up alot along the way, by word of mouth, by discoveries on other blogs and by making friends who have given me advice.
  However, there is always more to be inspired by and I am certain the class will give me some idea of what to implement here and what I can do to define my blogging style further.
Plus my friend Lisa is also taking the class and so it'll be such fun to share the experience with someone who has such a similar type of blog to my own.

I have changed my blog header and have placed in some photos i've taken lately on my phone, i may change these at intervals, but keep the wording banner beneath them.

love kat x

Enchanted wood - In the depth of beauty

Source: toocutethings.blogspot.com via Kat on Pinterest

Source: lovelyclusters.tumblr.com via Kat on Pinterest

Source: flickr.com via Kat on Pinterest

Source: honestlywtf.com via Kat on Pinterest

Source: flickr.com via Kat on Pinterest

I am sleeping peacefully beneath a blanket of branches.
When i awaken to the evenings light, i make wishes on dandelion clocks, and feel tiny wings float around me. The softeness of the dewy grass, the sound of bells on the breeze, it is as if the long forgotten magicalness is returning to the world.

kat xxxx

The magic of 3 by Fryd!

Jeanette your magazine amazes me, every issue is beautiful,

you can feel how much heart you put into it

and how much you love to share it with us freely.

So full of light colour and upliftment!THANKYOU!

My favourite pieces this 3rd issue....

the quote - "don't let anyone dull your sparkle" & the dreamcatcher feature!

i recommend you to read it too my lovelies - 3byFryd

it will help you feel like a butterfly

kat xxxxxx

The smallest moments

sometimes what we think of as small insignificant moments, are actually some of the most important ones,
love kat x

photo credits:
1. blue, 2. Twenty Six on Friday -Takes my breath away edition, 3. Dear wonderful world., 4. teeny purple flower

Decorative details - calling on you

 

Today's decorative details......background of wallpaper by Designers guild,
wrapping paper by Julia Davey Ceramics ..... photo of girl by Teddy Meyer via Unicorn Dream magazine.... circle image by Miles of Light .... mirror at An angel at my table
.... cushion by Day birger at Wild swans.... hanging tassels by Fleur lux
..... knitted house by Colette Bream

and i hope you enjoy the discoveries,

kat xxxxx

A source of healing wisdom

The Cygnus bookclub review dropped through my letterbox today.
I always take some time out to browse the latest mind body spirit books, and the articles they share are more than just your average paragraph. They are proper excerts from the books, and you can often learn so much from these alone. It has been a real source of wisdom to me over the years of healing.

Cygnus has a real friendly community vibe to it, the newsletter is free and their website also holds all the previous features to read. I have had pretty much all my life changing books from them since the nineties. The reductions in prices are second to none, and their wise, edited selection, mean you can trust you are getting books that can really make a difference.

This article really touched me in the May issue. Its on a book called Dying to be me by Anita Moorjani and is  Hay house published 10.99 usually, but £7.25 cygnus price. Its about her journey through cancer and how after 4 years she almost died, and had a near death experience. It gave her an awakened view of where the cause of her dis-ease or fear lay, and how to overcome it. She needed to see she was good enough just as she was, and to end her deeply held fear of what others thought of her. (read the full article online here)

Often,the cause of a dis-ease on the physical level can be deeply held emotion, such as anger, grief, or fear.
It is within us to open up to a journey that can lead us to finding this, and healing at that level can mean physical symptoms decrease or disolve. This is empowering, but we must remember to never judge another or ourselves in the unfolding on this type of work. For sometimes where the required healing lies isnt always obvious, and may not be as simple as identifying a single issue or fear and removing it with focused willpower. For the depth of any one persons healing, and the true scope of an illness cannot be seen on the surface. There are multitude of facets to anyone's life, and the reason for a condition may involve deeper purposes that either become clearer with time, or to which there isnt an explantion within that life time.

I remember years ago reading Steven Levine's book,Healing into life and death, and how through his work with the terminally ill, he described how healing, in the way he had come to see it, was not just about getting better and remaining alive.
For some the healing that took place in their hearts was deep and profound, it radiated out and touched others in their lives, their work in resolving their pain was complete and yet they may still have gone onto pass away. And for others they may have seemed to barely scratch the surface, they may have still had unease, and yet their condition went into remission.
This outlook from someone who's wisdom was gained through direct experiences working with those who were in hospices and at the end of their life, shifted my understanding of what "to heal" really meant. And it stays with me to this day.

So, with that in mind, i would say, the most appropriate steps to take are simply to believe in healing, but to not seek to define exactly what that must look like. 

To know that your body does have capability to heal, and that your heart and soul are always seeking to guide you in the steps you personally need to take to restore more ease at the levels you need it most. Being aware of what comes our way & feels right at any given moment. An allowing, and a non resistance to what is, combined with an "anything is possible" outllook.

The most help you can be to yourself or another on their path,
is to extend compassion and unconditional love.
And to never have set ideas, or in other words judgements.
Be open, flexible, and flow as much as possible.
Ways of being that books from Cygnus have no doubt helped me in developing.

Bright touches on cloudy days

 

 

I felt like painting my nails a nice uplifting colour.To make up for the grey skies.
So i chose this coraly pink, which i got lately from Wildswans.
Fnug is Scandinavian, and not a brand i have had before but i like how its turned out.
The colour is named "A-lister".

Breeze through the blossom trees

I came across the beautiful photographer Sarah Loven, and wanted to share this video with you, it is so very magical.

Thank you for sharing this Sarah, i don't know if i shall get to see the blossom trees in the real world this year, and your video brought their beauty right to my door.xx

You can find more of her work on her flickr Sarah Lyn Love
facebook Sarah Loven
and website Sarah Loven Photography

love kat x

Kindgram - sharing kindness

 

Kindgram is a little project that i share with Lisa of Soul-o-mama

We both care passionately about being kind,

we know personally about the often overlooked power of a truly kind heart.

 We have been helped by kindness, at times when we greatly needed support.

So we want to honour it.

We both like to pass kindness on to others.

As well as treasure the kindness we receive.

x x x

Lisa came up with the idea of tagging photos at Instagram and elsewhere online with the hash tag #kindgram

And so the idea of telling stories of kindness was born

the idea is a simple one and easy to work into your day to day online sharing

 

there are 3 main reasons to tag #kindgram

 

    (1)  If someone in your day is kind to you and you want to show gratitude,

take a photo and share a bit about the story,

remember to add the tag #kindgram

(2)  If you want to extend kind thoughts or words to another in need
again share a photo and tag it #kindgram

 

(3) If you want to ask for kindness, or prayers maybe, if youre having a tough time

and just want to reach out and share what's happening, then also tag it #kindgram

 

Remember to visit the hashtag on instagram to read others stories

of how kindness has touched their hearts.

x x x

 and for more of my writing about what KINDGRAM means, see what we shared on this post

love and kindness

Kathryn and Lisa